What about the background?!?

I have been struggling for a few days - with a few things. I knew I was at a near breaking point. I was in need for a serious timeout.

Yesterday I received an email from SBC about this weekends "50 Hours of Prayer" and it made me think --- think about my life. Comparing it to the prayer focus they were giving for church folks and the future of the church. I started to think of my life - comparing to my life and its future.

The past few weeks have been so confusing for me. Considering my future, jobs, my hearts desires, my spiritual walk and so many things - I felt exhausted mentally and was definitely beyond emotionally  broken.

I think too often I allow the craziness of "life" to weigh me down and disregard the important stuff. I let the crazy schedule I lead take over on the "quiet" moments of life and forget that sitting at my Father's feet is the most comforting thing around.

I decided to declare a truce with the distractions of my life and take a sabbatical from Facebook for the weekend. I love staying in touch with my friends and family but I just needed to focus on me and Jesus!

On my way home tonight from Sports Chalet I heard this song on Air1 and it's EXACTLY what I needed to hear. The words are exactly where my heart has been the past few days - struggling to understand what am I suppose to be doing. In some ways, it still doesn't answer all the questions but it answers the most important one! If I take the background of the journey and allow Christ to be the showcase - HE will allow things to fall into place as He sees fit.

Background

Chorus. [C-Lite]

I could play the background. I could play the background. 

Cause I know sometimes I get in the way. S

o won't You take the lead, lead, lead, lead, lead. 

So won't You take the lead, lead, lead, lead, lead. 

And I can play the background, the background. 

And You can take the lead.

Verse 1 [Lecrae] 

It's evident You run the show, so let me back down. 

You take the leading role, and I'll play the background. 

I know I miss my cues, know I forget my lines 

I'm sticking to Your script, and I'm reading all Your signs. 

I don't need my name in lights. I don't need a starring role. 

And why gain the whole wide world, if I'm just gon' loose my soul. 

And my ways ain't purified, I'll live according to Your Word. 

I can't endure this life without Your wisdom being heard. 

So word to every dancer for a pop star, 

Cause we all play the background, but mine's a Rock Star. 

Yeah. So if you need me I'll be stage right. 

Prayin' the whole world will start embracing stage fright. 

So let me fall back and stop giving my suggestions 

Cause when I follow my obsessions I end up confessing. 

That I'm not that impressive, matter of fact I'm who I are. 

A trail of star dust leading to the Superstar.

Chorus. [C-Lite]

I could play the background. I could play the background. 

Cause I know sometimes I get in the way. S

o won't You take the lead, lead, lead, lead, lead. 

So won't You take the lead, lead, lead, lead, lead. 

And I can play the background, the background. 

And You can take the lead.

Verse 2 [Lecrae] 

I had a dream that I was captain of my soul. 

I was master of my fate, lost control, and then I sank. 

So I don't want to take the lead Cause I'm prone to make mistakes. 

All these folks that follow me gon' end up in the wrong place. 

So, just let me shadow You, and just let me trace Your lines. 

Matter of fact just take my pen. Here, You create my rhymes. 

Cause if I do this by myself I'm scared that I'll succeed. 

And no longer trust in You, cause I only trust in me. 

And see, that's how you end up headed to destruction. 

Paving a road to nowhere. Pour your life out for nothing. 

You pulled my card, I'm bluffing You know what's in my hand. 

Me, I just roll to trust You, You cause the dice to land. 

I'm in control of nothing. Follow You at any cost. 

Some call it sovereign will, all I know is You the boss. 

And man I'm so at ease. I'm so content. 

I play the background like it's an instrument.

Chorus. [C-Lite]

I could play the background. I could play the background. 

Cause I know sometimes I get in the way. S

o won't You take the lead, lead, lead, lead, lead. 

So won't You take the lead, lead, lead, lead, lead. 

And I can play the background, the background. 

And You can take the lead.

Bridge. [Lecrae] 

I know I'm safest when I'm in Your will and trust Your word. 

And I know I'm dangerous when I trust myself, my vision blurred. 

And I ain't got no time to play life's foolish games. 

Got plenty aims, but do they really glorify Your name? 

And it's a shame the way I want to do these things for You, yet, 

Don't even cling to You. Take time to sit and glean from You. 

It seems that You were patient in my ignorance. 

If ignorance is bliss, its cause she never heard of this.

Chorus. [C-Lite]

I could play the background. I could play the background. 

Cause I know sometimes I get in the way. S

o won't You take the lead, lead, lead, lead, lead. 

So won't You take the lead, lead, lead, lead, lead. 

And I can play the background, the background. 

And You can take the lead.

I could play the background. I could play the background. 

Cause I know sometimes I get in the way. S

o won't You take the lead, lead, lead, lead, lead. 

So won't You take the lead, lead, lead, lead, lead. 

And I can play the background, the background. 

And You can take the lead.